How Childhood Shapes Your Parenting (And How to Break the Cycle)

On teaching your kids—and yourself—that it’s okay to be imperfect.

This piece is about parenting, but it’s also about something I see all the time in consulting: the patterns we were rewarded for can become the patterns that keep us stuck.

My kids are three and five, which means I spend a lot of time answering one question:

“Why?”

It usually happens in the car. I answer one, and another “why” comes from the back seat. Then another. Before long, they’re going back and forth, asking “why” over and over like it’s a game.

Sometimes I laugh.

Sometimes I want to snap, “I’m not an oracle! Stop asking so many questions.”

And honestly, sometimes I really don’t know. So I’ll say, “I’m not sure. That’s a good question. What do you think?”

They always have an answer.

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